Victims and the stupid

I have started to notice, that there are many victims all around me. But not victims of crime or any "-isms."

Victims of life. These hopeless souls are the kind of people who stir up some drama when life becomes too normal for them. In their heads the seriously believe that life is against them and that the world hates them. 

I've come to notice that being around victims, communicating with them and just knowing about them changes me. Everything I hate about them, makes me observe everything that's wrong with me. Victims and stupid people make me:

1.  Aggressive. There are brains in those heads, begging for attention, and I can't stand the thought of possible intelligence just dying away like David Hasselhoff's career.  
2. More heartless than I already am. I tend to feel the urge to grab a victim by its head and just scream. No words. Just a scream. Loud and without end.
3. Want to consider the perks of becoming an alcoholic.. or developing a prozac addiction.. or doing drugs when it's really bad.

But.. I have found myself a coping mechanism.. Like people with ADD! When someone goes auto-stupid on me.. I count to ten while I take deep breaths. Following this I go into my world, And here, I see myself sitting on a big stage with the criminally stupid next to me. I stare it deep in the eyes, just to embrace the moment... And then I turn and grip it with both hands firmly, and I throw that oxygen thief right off my stage and I close the scene with:"I'll leave you without an insult.. Because you are possibly stupid enough, that you wouldn't even understand."

Do not attempt to insult the dumb because you will frustrate yourself into a deep depression. Let the dumb be dumb with the other species of dumb called "victims"

Calm yourself.

All of us know the feeling of a bad mood. We have our reasons, granted. But I've realized, when someone doesn't know how to deal with their bad mood, their environment becomes a mini war zone.

One can only hope not to catch someone on a war zone day, most try to be polite and calm. But in my case.. It's a little different. You are allowed to be in a bad mood all you want, but once you begin to threaten my mood.. Bad things are gonna go down. 

It sucks that your cat died and your cellphone broke, it really does! If my phone broke and if liked cats enough to have one, I would be in a bad mood too. Let's just go over some fun facts.. 

1. I didn't break your phone
2. I didn't kill your cat
3. Your mood is actually not my problem, but you can become my problem, if you do not calm yourself or pop a Prozac or something.

Some people are all gentle towards the bad mood mafia and they live with it. But I don't do that.. If you annoy me, I'll let you know. No lie.

If you are in a crappy mood and you feel like you're about to explode on an innocent bystander, don't. They might be in a bad mood too, which means death is a possibility for you. Go hit a wall or something. There are enough people in bad moods all their lives.. Don't let that bad aura spread and consume us all. Come on, get happy now! 

Assumptions.

Let me begin by saying, I like Madiba. He's an inspiration and a glorious icon and known all around the world.

People have their opinions, I know "everyone's entitled to an opinion" blah, blah, blah.. But what if my opinion is that your opinion is wrong? That's fine too, right? It's world news that Nelson Mandela is not well. I've been reading "RIP Madiba" for about a week now, people don't know what is going on. So they assume he died.

He hasn't died yet. He's very sick and in the hospital. People don't get that part right.. But one thing that completely disgusted me today, was hearing and reading about ANC members arriving at the hospital, with T-shirts promoting next years election.. Yes I'm serious.. The man's dying, and they're marketing. I know they can't help him get better, but taking advantage of the situation isn't the way to go, it's sickening, in the bad way.  

Others are praying for him to stay alive. I don't understand that either, he's 94 years old. He's had a long hard life. Anyone who knows anything about South African history would know he has been through a lot. If you read his book you would know too. Long Walk To Freedom. I recently remembered about his book, and I started searching for it. I found it in the study, the covers are tired and old as the man on it.

I flipped it open and I saw something quite remarkable. Nelson Mandela's autograph.

To those who don't understand, Madiba wrote:"To Paul S. Cilliers (my dad), Best wishes."

Madiba is world famous, some see him as a freedom fighter, others see him as a terrorist. He is a great man, and he is responsible for the good changes in SA. But if you think about it.. Madiba did big things etc., but he didn't do them until the day he landed in the hospital. Madiba has maintained a low profile since his retirement in 2004.

He had public appearances here and there, but nothing in excess. Some think that South Africa will crash and burn if Madiba dies. But we won't though. We had problems when he was alive, and we will have them when he passes on. He is the father of the nation, as they say. But think of SA as a child. Children lose their dad's, but they go on with their lives, and so will our country. He is an amazing role model who means so much to us. But we can't hold on to him forever, the same as any other loved one.

We are not in charge of the series of events in our country, we can only go on and honor Madiba the best we can.

A new view.

Everyone, I have an announcement.

Today, I found someone new. He's big, strong, dark and handsome. I can change his look as I please, he won't complain about being tired.. He has a great memory and I understand him so well, you would almost think he came with an instruction manual! His name is 600D and he's all mine. He's quite heavy after a while, but I can live with that!

600D Canon. I love him.. Because he's the new view in my life.. I am definitely over my ex. He was small, ugly and quite sad!

  We had a good run.. But I think It's time I move on to better things, it's not you, it's Canon. Forever in my heart Fuji.. Forever.

I'll try to add some of my own photos to posts from now on! for now, here are my dogs!

A simple request

We all want certain things in life..

I am not a high maintenance person all the time.. Sometimes I have a few simple requests that can easily be fulfilled, but somehow life does not seem to get that. If I wanted to be married to Johnny Depp, I would totally get why that can't happen in this world.

But today, I didn't ask for Johnny Depp, or a castle, or a mystical land where school is fun. Nope, I just asked for some makeup. 11 sets of the same makeup, for the new girls in the band. I went to the store where I bought it last year, to my disgust they didn't have in stock, and I could not place any hope on them because they are perhaps, the most retarded store, in South Africa. Seriously.

So Today, I decided to go to another mall to look for similar makeup, sounds easy enough, right? I Looked EVERYWHERE. not one of those bitches had enough of the same sets! - That I could afford with the money they gave me that is... Anyway, after being in every store twice I decided to mix it up. I just took colors that were similiarish and bought 11. I will test my makeup skills and I will make the makeup fear me and then it WILL look the same on the girls.. Challenge accepted.

Life is supposed to be hard, I get it, I've read the quotes and all that crap. But damn, Life didn't have to be a bitch about a few sets of makeup. I almost went onto a psychological complex because of this. Stupid face crayons..

Sexy.

  

My best friend

Life is hard, but love is worse.

I liked this guy, for a long time. I was just never the right one, I just stood by and watched him like someone else.

I could never let him go. He was one of those people you can't lose, and I knew that. So I stayed. I was a friend to him, and I tried my best to be okay. As time went on, I realized I will never be with him, and I started feeling fine with that too. We're still friends, but there are these moments I just wish I was good enough, you now?

I think I fell too hard too fast for a boy that would only be a friend. I decided that to have him as a friend was better than having nothing at all. He's good and honest and true and I started liking him at a vulnerable stage of my life. I would have said I'm in love, but I don't even know what love is. I think I fell in love with the idea of being in love.

He's my best friend, and I'm okay with that.
Most of the time.

-Dedicated to Lee Anne! and anyone who understands..

There's something about ...

We are human, and humans are curious.

People have the ability to disguise their hearts and thoughts, be it with a smile, a look, what they say and especially what they don't say. Doing this, we only want to know more about them. I'm sure most of us have encountered such a person.

The person can excite you, frustrate you and even annoy you by doing nothing at all. They're not the problem, you are. We are more bothered by the things we don't know and not so much scared in the sense of the word.

I recently came across such a person. I see this person a lot. There is something in his smile, that makes you wonder what he's thinking. It's not a crush, it's the uncertainty of where I stand that interests me. Others' opinions don't matter, but I really want to know what his opinion is, because I am human, and thus. Curious.

The way he looks at a person, makes that person feel like they're the only person in the world. Regardless of who they are. And the moments when he stares and you try to catch your breath. He's like one of those unreachable people. A celebrity, but only I know him, and he doesn't have a Wikipedia page that can help me out.. If that makes any kind of sense.

What is he thinking, Where did he come from and why do I care??

These are the questions that haunt me. The part I hate the most is that I will probably never know..
 One does not simply interrogate an innocent person. No, no...

I'll just wonder some more.